Disclaimer: This post is very subjective and controversial, please proceed with care because I’m totally unapologetic for any consequences
I read this article by chance – someone authored a book called “Assholes Survival Guide”. Wow I liked the book instantly even before reading! It’s not just me, see, someone else points out that there truly are assholes in this world. I had always wanted to be nice to others, hence never dared to admit that sometimes assholes do exist in my life. And then most of the times I was taken for granted. And then I was unhappy that I was taken for granted. Who to be blamed? Me.
But these days I’m different. I still have faith in people, I still be nice to others, I still am as naïve as I was. But the difference is, I learned to set boundaries with assholes.
In my earlier post about “Trust Fund”, I mentioned I keep a virtual account of trust level between me and others. Some people turn themselves to assholes after sometimes, or maybe that is their original color anyway, just I was blind to see. Usually when I know they are assholes is the time that the trust fund has gone bankrupt. A little late? Yes.
Once they are certified as assholes, I set boundaries with them.
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Recognize they are assholes
- Regardless of how close we were, I must first recognize they have changed, and accept the fact that they have turned themselves into assholes. It is a very sad thing to see someone I used to trust so much to earn this label, but then, I gotta protect myself.
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Never believe in assholes again
- Stop taking shit from them. Recognize the fact that they have been bullshitting, it’s a high chance that whatever comes from them is just another shit. Why take? No, no, no.
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Distant myself from assholes
- Stop contacting them. Stop answering their calls, messages or emails. Unfriend them on social media, physically and virtually distant myself from them. Give them no chance to send bullshits.
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Label the assholes
- I once updated someone’s name on my phone contact list to “Full of Shits”. It stops me instantly from checking her messages, because the new name is a reminder that I should not talk to her anymore.
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If cannot avoid them, face them
- Actually, I faced all the assholes in my life. I confronted them, and I fought for my own ground. If I don’t even fight for myself, who else would? This happens at work or some common friends that I just couldn’t create a physical boundary. Because I don’t take this shit and if I cannot peace out, well they gotta take those back!
At this point you might be confused, is the nice SK gone? I’m not a perfect person – I’m occasionally judgmental, mean, miserable, pathetic. However I’m also learning to be a better person, and doing my best to move past all 5 steps above to the final resort below:
Peace out
Most of the times I just wish them well, and bid farewell to them (virtually). May the assholes never come back and we shall never cross path again, all I want is just peace out. No revenge and remorse, we can go on with our lives separately and happily.
